Ladies, making friends is hard… especially with women, we all know we can be a little cray cray at times! Especially if we haven’t had our coffee yet!
We all want to have great friendships and meet new people who we can connect on the same level with and create some amazing memories.
My eldest daughter just entered into elementary school and I am a total newbie to the everyday drop off routine… which we are still getting used to after 2 full months. I have never seen kids so tired and so quick to cry in my life. Three girls, there is so much crying in our house it’s insane!
I can already imagine the teen years…
On her first day of school, I made a little secret pact with myself that I wanted to make a few new mom friends. My husband and I have a group of really great friends that we have known for years and years. But I wanted to meet a few new people that I could meet up with during the week or weekend. In general I just wanted to create some new friendships.
Currently we are in a different city than our long time friends which makes it a little harder to meet up. Creating some new friends who are close by sounded like a great idea to me.
This got me thinking on our drive over there, how do I approach another mom the right way with out being pushy? What if I let my nerdy dorky self out on accident and totally ruin my shot…
Yes, this totally sounds like dating and it kinda is! Que the wine!
That day I was dressed a little nicer because I didn’t want everyone to know yet that my normal wardrobe these days is workout pants, a bun and tank top. But when I got there I scoped out my girls class, dropped her off and I checked out the moms that were there as well.
People watching at its finest!
I was looking for a few things, people who I thought might also wear workout pants, or had kids my other kids age also tagging along with them or maybe they parked on the same side of the street I did.
Whatever the observation was, I wanted to find something to spark a little interest and give me the courage to muster up and go talk to someone new. After giving my initial overview, the next few days into school I tried to look available and open to talk and still keeping my eye out for things I had in common with other moms.
There are a few moms that parked on the same side of the street and one that I had a quick convo with because her husband worked in my old line of work in the fashion industry. So I got to talking to her. I also found two other moms that live very close to me and got to talking to them about things to do in our city.
SO I decided to take the plunge and ask a mom out on a mom date.
I asked the mom who’s husband was in my old line of work to meet for coffee and she accepted… it was awesome meeting with someone new and our conversation was great.
It was one of those conversations where you felt like you were friends for a long time and had great flow. Since then we have meet a couple other times and talk when we are dropping off or picking up the kids.
It wont always work like this, but when it does I am thankful for stepping out of my comfort zone and doing something that isn’t narutal to me. I met someone knew and developing it into a friend ship and I get to share something new with you.
So here are 5 Tips for Making New Mom Friends…
Keep your Eyes Open– be observant, patient and be open. Look for people who seem to do the same things you do, have kids the same age. Don’t forget to smile. No one wants to talk to a mom with resting b*** face every time they drop off their kid. Which I get is hard, if your kids are like mine and are absolutely crazy in the morning, then I feel ya! All in all be available.
Try to Join In– if you see some moms talking, try to jump in and get yourself in there. One conversation can lead to many! And if one doesn’t work out that’s ok, try another day or a new group.
Spark Conversation– be the initiator, be the one to ask questions and then listen. Listening is an art form and can make you a better person in so many aspects of your life. If you are a good listener you should have no problem making friends and creating trust! Being a good listener also translates to being a better mom, read my post on How Listening Can Make you a Better Mom.
Find a Connection- find the topic that gets the spark going. Do you both love coffee? Are your kids in the same sports? Do you live close to each other?
Take the Plunge- Just like sparking a conversation, be the one to make the first move and ask to meet for coffee or go to the park. You never know the other mom maybe wanting to ask to but is not confident as well. It could be exactly what both of you need.
Finding new mom friends can be scary, but stepping out of your comfort zone and finding some new friends can be a game changer!
A quick coffee date and someone for BBQ’s in the summer which comes with friends for your kids… how could that be bad?! A little girl time during the week makes every mom a better mom! This could be your best friend for the next 30 years. Or if it doesn’t work out, there is always another mom out there that has the same interests as you and wants a friend too!
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